The Red Button


I lost my temper this morning.

What happened?

Daughter expected me to make her breakfast for her. The thing is, I’m training her to make it on her own. It’s the school holidays so I thought this is the best time coz…well, coz she’s not going to school. A few days now, I felt she still expected me to do it for her. Like this morning. In fact, she asked me to my face, whether I did. I said, “No, I didn’t.” And then she put on a black face. She turned around, walked to the kitchen and came back with just a small box of cereal. She walked right back into the bedroom. That was the red button. The attitude. I walked, or rather I marched up to her. I raised my voice, “WHY DO YOU EXPECT ME TO MAKE YOUR BREAKFAST WHEN YOU’RE FREE RIGHT NOW? WHY ARE YOU GIVING ME THIS ATTITUDE?!” I said more but I can’t remember. It just burst out of me.

So why are you telling Me this, child?

I need to tell someone.

Thank you. I’m flattered.

God. Come on. You’re my best friend. You’ll always be the one I’ll turn to when I have a problem. You’re my shoulder to cry on. No need to thank me.

Why not? You deserve it. You are one of a few (or many) who believe that I Am the only one they can turn to whenever they have a problem and heed my advice. I repeat–and heed my advice. There are others who turn to Me and I in turn give advice but–

Let me guess. But don’t heed. Don’t take action. Don’t create their reality.

Yes. All of the above. They pray, they meditate, they are aware of the signs and yet they do not believe. They doubt what they feel. They doubt the thoughts I place in their minds. And so what happens? They–


Yes. They get angry. They get frustrated. The same way you felt earlier when you lost your temper with your daughter. Imagine feeling that way for the rest of your life.

No, thanks. I don’t want to imagine. What I felt just now was enough. I certainly don’t wanna be like that my whole life.

So how’s your daughter now?

Not so good. She’s sulking.

Frustration and anger affect others who are in contact with you. Especially one’s family. So what are you going to do to resolve this problem?

Nothing at the moment. I know that I lost my temper for a reason. It is for her to think about why she’s acting the way she’s acting. If I didn’t lose my temper and just keep ignoring her attitude, the situation might get worse.

How so?

Well, the problem will be swept under the rug and we will pretend that it doesn’t exist. But we still know it’s there. And I think that’s when resentment and frustration will surface.

No need to think, child. That’s exactly what will happen. Most of your relationships, especially marriages, end up broken and irreparable because problems are swept under the rug, as you call it. Pretending that the problem doesn’t exist will not make the problem disappear. You lost your temper for a reason. Your soul is letting another soul know that he or she is unhappy with the situation. It is the red button. And what are red buttons for, usually?

Emergencies. Meaning of emergency–“a sudden, urgent, usually unexpected occurrence or occasion requiring immediate action.”

Requiring immediate action. Losing your temper is your soul pressing the red button on a situation that requires immediate action. Now tell Me–what will happen if you do not press the red button? And the emergency is happening right there in front of you. Unfolding right in front you? What will happen?


What else?

Casualties. Or heaven forbid, deaths.

Need I say more?

No. But am I not contradicting myself, God? I have a picture in my tweets saying, “But if I don’t scold or punish, what do you want me to do?”

Yes. What’s the next line?

“Try communication, understanding, patience, tolerance, forgiveness. It’s not the end of the world. There’s no such thing as good or bad. Only our judgement of it.” So I didn’t try all this stuff. Instead I scolded.

The key word here is “try.” Did you try to suppress your temper?

That’s just it. I couldn’t. I lost it. I lost control.

Like you lost control when you shouted at your Dad.

Yeah! Exactly.

And what did I say about that incident?

That the shouting came from my soul.

It’s the same thing with your daughter. What you cannot control will usually be from your soul. It is your soul’s defence mechanism. Once your soul is being violated it will protest in any way it can. And raising your voice to convey this protest is one of them. How long did the scolding last?

A few seconds. Probably 3 or 4 seconds at the most. Then I left the room.

There’s your control. The protest has been conveyed. It is now the offender’s turn to think about what happened and decide what to do to repair the damage. It may take a while or it may not. It depends on both parties. What are you going to do about the situation now?

Well, I’ll leave her alone for a while. But we still have to interact so when it comes to that I’ll try to talk to her as I usually do but in a way that I’m letting her know that the problem still exists. I’m just pushing it aside for the moment so that we can act as per normal. It is up to her to decide what to do when the situation shows up again. And that’ll be tomorrow morning when she needs to have her breakfast.

The Law of Retraction. It is up to a person to decide whether to apply it or not. Besides, child, a box of cereal is still breakfast, is it not?

But it’s not enough! She needs a hot drink and some fruits. Which I usually give to her for breakfast.

Rules & regulations.

What? No…Oh, I see what You mean.

What do you see?

Just because I believe that that is a proper breakfast doesn’t mean she has to.

Precisely. It’s called freedom. It’s up to her to decide whether she wants to starve to death or not.

She won’t starve–oh man! You love this, don’t You?

Love what?

This reverse psychology thing.

I don’t know what you’re talking about, child.

Yeah, right.