I’m working on my fiction right now to post on those online community for writers. God gave me the idea of
sneaking incorporating The Truth in stories to make it more interesting for young adults. And who knows I might just publish one day…(watch out E L James!)
Anyway. The story-line of “My Diary Is Called Edna” is a spin-off from “Blog of A Teenage Beauty”. Here’s an excerpt–(read: what I’ve written so far.)
My Diary is called Edna. Don’t ask me why. It’s the first name that popped into my head. Anyway, I “talk” to Edna like she’s my BFF. And you’ll notice that I talk to her like I’m having a conversation with Myself. You could say I’m “talking” to The Voice in My Head. I find it more interesting than the usual diary format of writing one’s own thoughts because I sort of get an answer to my questions and sometimes even sort out my problems this way. I like it. So that’s all that matters…
Wednesday, 15 May 2013, 9:22pm
Hello dear. How was the audition?
Tell me about it.
They’re all so gorgeous!
All those girls at the audition! I thought I was the only one auditioning. But when Mum and I got there, there were thousands of them!
Thousands? Where were you? In a stadium?
Well, not really thousands. There were about 50 or so of us. But they all looked so gorgeous! It felt like I was up against thousands! Now I know how the ugly duckling feels.
You’re not ugly.
If you were there, you’d agree with me.
You’re not ugly. There’s no such thing as ugly in this world. Everything and everyone’s beautiful. You are all God’s creations.
Oh no. Please don’t start that God stuff now. I’m not in the mood.
God is always in the mood. Anyway, let’s get back to your audition. Forget about the “gorgeous others”. How did you do in the audition?
How do you think I did? After seeing all those gorgeous girls at the waiting area my heart just sank. My confidence flew out the window! I couldn’t remember my lines and I was so nervous I nearly threw up!
What part were you auditioning for?
It doesn’t matter now. I’m sure I’m NOT gonna get it.
Remember what I said about “thoughts creating your reality”?
It’s life stuff, dear. We’re talking about life. Your life. So what did they say, “Don’t call us, we’ll call you?”
No. They said, “We won’t call you.” Period.
No. I don’t know! Oh man! Life sucks! I can’t go back to Singapore a loser! My friends’ll laugh at me! Oh no! My ex! He’ll gloat like crazy and I’d wanna just die and get sucked into a black hole or something!
You’re over-reacting. And why do you care what others think of you? That’ll be like asking for their approval. You don’t need anyone’s approval on how to live your life, do you?
No. But they’re my friends. I have to face them and it’ll be so embarrassing.
If they really are your friends they’ll accept you as you are. As for your ex…well, he’s your ex for a reason.
Cause he turned out to be a jerk, that’s why. A controlling jerk.
Shush! That’s not what I meant. Everything that happens in your life happens for a reason. And that goes for people that come into your life. Do you think you’d be here right now if your ex didn’t dump you?
Excuse me! I was the one who dumped him! If I hadn’t, I’d probably still be kowtowing to his every whim like a lapdog. And he’s not totally the reason why I’m here. I was really disappointed with my ‘A’ level results and I didn’t wanna slog through another couple of years studying a course I totally abhor. And what made it worse was that I only had the option of enrolling in a pathetic private school where I would have been rubbing shoulders with losers like myself. Thank God for that guy at MacDonald’s. If he hadn’t come along I’d probably be the one serving him burger and fries behind the counter the next time he came by.
You see, that’s what I mean. Every event that happens in your life happens because you want it to happen.
No way! I definitely did not ask Daryl to go to that MacDonald’s and notice me and give me his biz card.
I assume Daryl’s the casting agent who spotted you.
Yeah. He was there at the audition. In fact, he was one of the interviewers. Daryl Chng something-something. Anyway, like I said, there is no way I made it happen that Daryl was there at MacDonald’s on that particular day and made him spot me as a potential and give me his biz card.
Yes, you did. Not consciously. Before you were born, your soul planned out everything that will happen in your life in order for you to accomplish whatever you want to accomplish in your lifetime. Now—
Wait a sec. My soul. That’s God stuff…
Fine. Let’s talk about God stuff. Besides, it takes my mind off the debacle that I made out of my audition. Please continue…
Thank you. Now, what you decide to do with the events that happen in your life is entirely up to you. You can either let it happen as it happens and not do anything about it—
Like when my ex told me to ignore Daryl and to “chuck his card in the bin”.
Yes. You could have allowed him to decide for you and followed his instructions or—
Or I could have taken control of the situation by ignoring my ex and keeping the card and calling Daryl to accept his offer. Which I did. And that is why I am here right now in Hong Kong waiting for a call to tell me that I failed to get a miniscule role with two lines in a major film produced and written by and starring the mega-star Stephen Chow.
Stephen Chow? You’re kidding! OMG!
Oh no. A groupie.
Ahem. I am an admirer of his work. I am NOT a groupie. Anyway, let’s get back to your life-stuff. As I was saying—by taking control of your life you are controlling what your soul has planned for your life. What you call a failure may not be a failure at all. It is what you do with what you call a failure is the next step to what your soul has planned for your life.
Oh yeah. That is so crystal clear I know exactly how my life will turn out from this moment onwards. Yay.
Sarcasm doesn’t suit you.
What I’m saying is—if you don’t get the part, what are you going to do about it?
What do you mean? If I don’t get it then I don’t get it. Period.
So you’re just going home with your tail between your legs and just wait for the next Daryl to come along, is that it?